Sunday, April 23, 2017

Junkyard Sheep and Goats




Hello.  May we welcome you to our business and share our ideas for the jobs of the future.  We are professional landscapers and lawnmowers.  Our job description profile explains how we are responsible for cleaning the company's grounds of all unnecessary foliage, a profession for which we are aptly suited.  We are employed full-time, 24/7, and are unaffected by recessions.  Our profession is on the cutting edge of economic and environmental excellence, trend setters.  The wave of the future.  Everything we do is completely organic, environmentally friendly and sustainable.  In addition, we are solar-powered, energy-efficient and off the grid.  


  At present, we are employed at a junkyard, or to be more correct, an automobile recycling factory.


Another business associate employed at our factory is sergeant of the security force, handles public relations and marketing.  We respectfully call him "Officer Dog".  If you scratch his back, he will do anything to keep you, the valued customer, satisfied.


As an aggressive sales-person, he devotes his full attention to the customer, never taking no for an answer as he details the wonders of our company.

"We are the leading authority on radical new technologies steeped in ancient practices.  We know what you need before you need it!"


"Don't think you can run away from me without buying something, I work on commission." pressures Dog.


He will pose for pictures, at no extra charge, to be used in advertising, marketing and on idolizing blogs.  Do take his picture quickly because his responsibilities are many and his time limited.


"Pack Leader has summoned and I must return to my other responsibilities, guarding the flock." Officer Dog announces.


"It was a pleasure meeting everyone and I look forward to working with you.  Text me the next time you are in town and we can do lunch."


16 comments:

  1. You are too funny, Jeannie!!! Thanks for the lovely post :)

    Chris

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do have an overactive imagination.

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  2. I'm going to send you a picture of our own sheep , Jeannie!!
    ;)

    Sophie-Marie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would LOVE to see your sheep! Email it to me. Wait a minute...you are winking at me with your emoji. You are teasing me. I fell for it. Shame on you Sophie-Marie!

      Delete
  3. So funny, Jeannie, as always! I laughed out loud. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sheep as a lawnmower, - a very good idea principally. I only hope,
    that there are no small metal remains or such things on that place.
    Otherwise they could hurt their pawns or swallow something.
    Well, maybe I am too much afraid of what could happen.
    Christel

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    Replies
    1. I don't know? They all seemed to be happy and content. I assume they would not eat anything that tasted bad, but I am only guessing.

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  5. Jeannie I did email you with pics attached!
    Hope you had them!!

    Wink again, Sophie-Marie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I got the email this morning and I must tell everyone what a joke Sophie-Marie has pulled on me! I tried to post the picture in this comment section but it would not let me. There is probably a button somewhere to push to allow it but who knows. Anyway I will describe what she sent to me: two BRIGHT BLUE stone statue sheep on the terrace of her condo right in the middle of a big city. They are very original creative yard art.
      What do your neighbors think of you?

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    2. I received an email from Sophie-Marie and I want to share what she said to me:

      Sophie-Marie: Ha ha!!! Those sheep have both a story and names. We found them by chance as they were on display in a clothes store. I told my husband I would LOVE to have them in our "garden". He went in and asked the manager if she would sell them. She eyed us as if we were crazy and answered "yeah. 50 euros each. Would that be okay??"

      They thus became my Christmas and birthday present two years ago!

      Their names are Coco and Chanel.

      Jeannie: I had to look up the conversion rate of euros to dollars and she spent $54.66 for each one!!!!!!!!!!! I think her husband loves her quite a bit.

      Delete
    3. I love him quite a bit too!!!!
      Sophie-Marie

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  6. Our neighbours are busy competing Jeannie. Will have to steal pictures of their roof terraces but so far I win!!!!(The sheep are not stone but resin, which makes it easier to store them back in our cellar when winter comes!!)

    Sophie-Marie

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    Replies
    1. So, correct me if I am wrong, but are you saying they are not made from hand chiseled marble but cheap plastic?

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  7. :D
    Sophie-Marie

    PS: I'm currently showing my husband and daughters your post on ARMADILLOS (oh so very exotic)
    Sophie-Marie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exotic is not the name I call those pests!

      Delete

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